Olga Akasi aka Ольга Акаси (Ukrainian, b. 1970, Kiev, Ukraine) – Found By Nobody Paintings: Oil on Canvas
I cry in the morning.
I cry into the night.
Tears to fill an ocean.
I won’t give up the fight.
I will wait each day.
Bow my head and pray.
You’ll return to me.
I can’t set you free.
Please wash away my sorrow and pain.
Let it flow down the streets with the rain.
Dissolved in torrents of despair and sadness,
Joining others on its way past the madness.
The ocean may take it far away,
To places, we cannot even say.
Where no one recognizes its sting
Or knows the infliction it can bring.
Let the rain grow harder with its might,
Becoming hail on this fateful night.
I want to be free of all traces
Of unwanted feelings and faces.
My body grows cold from the rain.
It stands clean and free from the pain.
Shivers create a path down my spine,
As I wait in the dark woods of pine.
I hold my head high to the wet spray.
It becomes a mist of blue and grey.
The faucet has turned off for the night,
Leaving me feeling clean and so right.
Lost and alone in my head,
Can’t fall asleep in my bed.
Waves crashing in my mind,
Pain is all I can find.
Take a walk on the beach I’m told
To clear the cobwebs from their hold.
But here I’m alone with the surf,
Lost and alone on my own turf.
The boat’s foghorn echoes my grief,
A loss profound beyond belief.
The soulful sound takes me away
To happier times I can say.
To times when you held me
And told me you loved me.
Those times are gone for good,
Forget I know I should.
At night when I close my eyes to sleep,
All I can see is our love so deep.
As hard as I might try,
I can’t let go and fly.
So here I walk on the beach,
Knowing you’re out of my reach.
But still, I yearn and burn
For a love, I can’t earn.
Take me away in the soft breeze.
Let your fingers flow through my hair.
I want to see your warm smile
And hunger for your loving touch.
Time for that is long past.
Victims of the battle we now are.
Hell is waiting for us both.
I can see his boat drifting offshore.
I will not let him take me.
I want to share paradise with you.
Warm breezes and soft winds
To wrap us tight in its cocoon.
No more glory to be had.
No more wins for our side.
Our losses are steep and many.
The mighty have fallen this night.
The sun sets for this evening.
It has not brought you back to me.
I will wait for all eternity
Until I have you by my side.
A fellow author is compiling poetry from authors on her WordPress site. The topic is letting go. I sat down and wrote this poem about my brother. As tears fell from my eyes, I felt sad and happy at the same time. Sad that I will never see him again, and happy that I can share my love with others.
Can I ever let go?
Can I ever let go of your touch?
At night, I dream of your fingers.
I can’t believe I miss you so much.
Your strokes through my hair still linger.
Can I ever let go of your eyes?
With great pride, you watched me grow.
I dearly pray for one last surprise.
You to return to me, I know.
I know my prayers won’t be answered.
My wishes never come true.
But I still have hopes to be answered.
And one day to see you too.
Can I ever let go of your humor?
Your wit and jokes had lightened my days.
I know this is much more than a rumor
That I’ll never have you brighten my days.
Days keep on passing.
But life must go on.
My heart is fasting
Each day it beats on.
Can I ever let go of you?
To my dearest, older brother,
My answer is a ‘no’ to you.
You weren’t only my brother.
You helped my mother to raise me.
You provided light for her blind eyes.
You’ll always be the best of me.
Until the day, I close my own eyes.
Source: dolcemania
My Battered Heart
The rose drifts to the ground,
Petals dry and wilting in the cold breeze.
A death resembling the demise of my heart
As an unraveling of feelings turns to dust.
A shoe grinds the rose petals to oblivion,
The preferred state of my battered heart.
The wind lifts the remnants of the flower
to circle around me with its dying breath.
Source: fascination–infatuation
A Desert Landscape
My mind is a desert landscape,
full of worries and contradictions.
It blasts away any chance of peace,
keeping me awake seeking sleep.
Thoughts are jumbled in the cobwebs,
lining the halls of my utter despair.
Bells ring in these curved walls,
warnings for me to take care.
Once one hole is filled in,
another one soon emerges.
A shovel will not do the job
to keep me safe from my pride.
A better state of mind is needed
to repair the damage already done.
My mind is a desert landscape,
full of worries and contradictions.
In my heart, I know he is there.
Waiting for me, I have no fear.
Lost him so many years ago.
Tears have finally stopped to flow.
One day I will see his dear face,
But I cannot keep up this pace.
Living day to day without his love.
His warmth had fit me like a glove.
I must accept the sad fact
That he’s never coming back.
He will not be alone anymore.
My parents have now walked through that door.
I can feel him circling from above,
Reassuring me when I need love.
Heartache is for me.
My heart yearns for thee.
Lies fall so easily from your lips.
They feel salty on my fingertips.
I must remain strong.
I hope I am wrong.
I need proof to trust you once more.
My heart is breaking at its core.
The salty mist soothes me.
The wind caresses me.
But I feel cold deep inside.
I need a safe place to hide.
Trapped in my own hell.
One small window to the world.
Trapped in my own mind.
Eyes searching for the truth.
Trapped in my own despair.
Sadness my only friend.
Trapped like this forever.
With no one to save me.
