CREEPY SCARY

creepy creepy scary

 
Creepy, creepy, scary.
This can become hairy.
The house is haunted and dark.
I came on a simple lark.


But now that I’m here,
I’m frozen with fear.
A party is to be held for us all,
But to evil creatures, we might just fall.


Down to the basement we go,
This is silly even I know.
Saws are swinging up ahead,
Looking to chop off a head.


Traps are falling from the low ceiling.
My wet feet are losing all feeling.
We are standing in a pool.
And I feel like a big fool.


We should have gone when we had a chance.
The creatures will make us sing and dance.
The Dead have a morbid sense of humor;
Should have listened to every rumor.


Goodbye to one and all.
I see the bouncing ball.


THE DEAD GAME

THE WASHING MACHINE

 

 

I’m having a bad dream,

no, maybe a nightmare,

of a washing machine.

 

It wakes me up at night.

It rumbles and whispers.

I hope it won’t take flight.

 

It’s moving and grooving

to a beat of its own,

that is far from soothing.

 

It’s a horrible sight.

A machine set to hard.

It’s ready for a fight.

 

I scream into my pillow.

“My clothing is all too clean,”

then I weep like a willow.

WHERE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE?

CNV00025 Thames footpath (by jim sedgley)

 

WHERE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE?

People were here earlier.

Women pushed strollers.

Joggers raced by.

Tourists held cameras.

Where did they go?

Take a peek in the tunnel.

You’ll find them.

Lined up

like wrapped packages.

Happy Birthday!

 

A LEAP OF FAITH

I still believe in my words from 2013.

 

 

 

I love to read all types of books: mysteries, thrillers, romance, horror, paranormal…

One day, I was in a bookstore, searching for a murder mystery with a haunted house in a small town. I couldn’t find any. Haunted houses didn’t seem to be as popular as they used to be. 

That day, I decided to write my own murder mystery in a coastal town with a deserted house. It’s called The Dead Game. The town’s inhabitants, who live in the woods behind Oasis, only come out at night. The story took a supernatural turn. I incorporated some satire and my wry sense of humor and it was done.

I took a leap of faith. I self-published my book. Time will tell if it becomes popular. My one desire is for people to read it and enjoy it. I have my murder mystery in a haunted house.

Please read it and enjoy!

 

The Husband Store

The joke is on us.doors

A brand new store has just opened in New York City that sells Husbands.
When women go to choose a husband, they have to follow the instructions at the entrance:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are 6 floors and the value of
the products increase as you ascend the flights. You may choose any item
from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you
CANNOT go back down except to exit the building.

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.
The 1st floor sign on the door reads:
Floor 1: These men have jobs.
The 2nd floor sign reads:
Floor 2: These men have Jobs and Love Kids.
The 3rd floor sign reads:
Floor 3: These men have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely good looking.
“Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the 4th floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4: These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and help with Housework.
“Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!”
Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads:
Floor 5: These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the 6th floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6: You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor.
There are no men on this floor.
This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

To avoid gender bias charges, the store’s owner opens a New Wives store just across the street.
The 1st first floor has wives that love sex.
The 2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money.
The 3rd,4th, 5th and 6th floors have never been visited.

ALIENATED

 

 

Some days I feel alienated

from the people around me.

They talk and walk like me

but their words are strange.

Thoughts of a different tongue.

Humor of a separate species.

Lovers of everything Kardashian.

Clothes made from the same cloth.

Clones of the lowest elements.

What happened to individuality?

What happened to modesty and charm?

Lost to our race.

Lost in the wake of selfies.

 

GOODBYE TO ONE AND ALL

1 nFnLITTbo-ReW53f2UEktQ

 

 

Creepy, creepy, scary.

This can become hairy.

The house is haunted and dark.

I came on a simple lark.

But now that I’m here,

I’m frozen with fear.

A party is to be held for us all,

But to evil creatures we might just fall.

Down to the basement we go,

This is silly even I know.

Saws are swinging up ahead,

Looking to chop off a head.

Traps are falling from the low ceiling.

My wet feet are losing all feeling.

We are standing in a pool

And I feel like a big fool.

We should have gone when we had a chance.

The creatures will make us sing and dance.

The Dead have a morbid sense of humor.

Should have listened to every rumor.

Goodbye to one and all.

I see the bouncing ball.


THE DEAD GAME


Kindle

http://amzn.to/1lKvMrP

Nook

http://bit.ly/1lFdqNj

A FACE

duc

A nose.

A mouth.

Two eyes.

A face.

What does it add up to?

Does it reveal the person inside?

Can you feel his heart?

Enjoy his humor?

Feel his pain?

See the world

through his eyes?

A person is not

the sum of his parts.

His parts add up to

much, much more.

DON’T LET LIFE GET YOU DOWN

LIFE CAN BE TOO SERIOUS

calebdwood:</p> <p>TOTEM</p> <p>Life can be too serious<br /> without some levity and fun.<br /> Follow your sense of humor.
calebdwood:</p> <p>TOTEM</p> <p>Life can be too serious<br /> without some levity and fun.<br /> Follow your sense of humor.
calebdwood:

TOTEM

Life can be too serious
without some levity and fun.
Follow your sense of humor.